Thursday, May 04, 2006

Lord, I Want ...

to be a Christian--in my heart!


Yes, I want to be a Christian--in my heart. It is, I believe, where Christianity truly resides. However, I understand that once I am a Christian in my heart, I am now challenged to the be a Christian in my life.

On May 5, 2006, I will have a conversation with UT Professor Robert Jensen and pastor of Austin's St. Andrews Presbyterian Church, Jim Rigby. Both have been caught in the crossfire of two dissenting groups: Christians and Atheists. I haven't had the honor of meeting Rev. Rigby, but I do know Bob. And the truth is that I know quite a few professed atheists and further, I don't like some of them. There! I said it.

So, why do I like Bob, the professed atheist, and not some others? Well, its quite simple. Bob has never made fun of or ridiculed my beliefs. I guess I'm sensitive when it comes to someone telling me that what I believe is about my being both superstitous and stupid. I don't like being made fun of especially when poking fun is done to try to make me feel bad. These days I don't defend my beliefs. Not too much anyway. I'm at least hoping that my actions speak louder than my Christian rhetoric. Of course, as I've learned, I often fall short of this Christian action when my back's against the wall. More often than not, I just don't want anyone trashing my beliefs. I also know that I've got to get over it.

Once, as part of a panel discussion, I responded to a question from the audience where I talked freely about my faith. Soon after, one of the panelists remarked that he wanted everyone to know that he didn't believe in God and that he certainly wasn't a Christian. He said that he was a Marxist and that Marx pointed out that "Christianity is the opium of the people." It got him a few snickers, but when it came time to respond, I told him, "Speaking as my drug of choice ..." 'cuz if that's his definition, I'd roll with it. But, what I also said was that my faith, my belief, wasn't a license to ridicule him just as his Marxism wasn't a license bait or ridicule me.

And I guess that's the reality of where were are. We've got so many divisions, some of them pretty darn serious. Racism. Classism. They each rank right up there as the number one divisiveness. And when I intellectualize things like faith, belief and religion, I find that I'm often not standing for much if I don't take a stand.

It's interesting to note, however, that it is easier to ridicule me about my Christianity than say, Desmond Tutu. Some of the very folks that will do their level best to 'diss' me would break their neck to get a seat next to Bishop Tutu and not because he's a Christian. Simply because he's famous. I've watched it happen too often to mention here, but suffice to say that we're constantly throwing out the baby with the bath water when we put up the fence of division, only to tear it down when it suits our purposes. Anyway, it would be a lot simpler to build bridges for all the building and tearing down that we do. And I'm guessing that we're only going to start building bridges when we find a way, as I'm thinking Bob and Pastor Jim have, to build a bridge where none existed before.

So, what's the answer? Seems like every peace hour blog ends with that question. I wish I had answers -- the kind of answers that would make folks say, "Hey, she's got a point--a good one." Then they'd change their narrow-minded, gilded actions to be more like the heart of Christ, even if they don't believe he's the son of God. I don't mind. I really don't. That's not the sticking point. The sticking point for me is to say you believe it and then act like you don't. And when its all said and done, I just want to know that I'm Christian in thought and deed and that if you're not, you at least act like a decent human being--Christ like after all. Makes us even, sort of.

So, I get Bob's Christian trek and I at least know that when we stand shoulder to shoulder on the same pew, we're talking about the same tenets of faith that makes us want to build a culture of peace for the world. That's bridge building, folks. Amen.